Recently, credit going to my brother, I’ve started playing music again. He started playing again in the last year when I took my guitar back that had been living at his house. He went into a frenzy, bought a few new guitars, and hasn’t put them down since. I guess the loss of a thing is great inspiration. Since that time, he has inspired me to pick it back up myself. I have started going through my own frenzy of buying guitars and equipment, and spending a lot of my evenings playing. The most awesome thing, though, is that after 30 years of going our own musical directions, my brother and I played together for the first time. The oddest thing, is that our two styles melded together to perfectly compliment each other. It is simply amazing. Together, our two counterparts make sense. I’ve since gone through my own frenzy of buying up equipment (I’d sold off most of my gear over the years), and we get together and jam every couple of weeks. It’s a great time.

It seems to be universal law that no construction contractor can show up regularly when scheduled and do the job for which they are paid.  Fuck contractors.

It’s no secret that I’m not a huge fan of children.  I realize that I can be somewhat insensitive to others in that regard, however, I do believe that my feelings in the matter do deserve a little respect.

I was super happy that GF’s family, who are usually fairly insensitive in regards to invading my sanity with their progeny, decided to wait until said progeny calmed down a bit and became a little more manageable prior to invading our space with them.  I was working outside for the bulk of the day, so I was thankfully out of doors when they arrived and was able to miss the ensuing meltdowns.  While I was outside, I did notice GF’s repeated trips to the garage for plungers of varying sizes.  I didn’t ask.  I didn’t want to know.  Turns out, I REALLY didn’t want to know…  GF’s mom, bless her heart, has a complete lack of consideration for others.  She’s not a bad person by any count, it’s just not how she thinks.  She’s been having children her whole life.  When her body was no longer capable of bearing children, she adopted.  That’s how my GF managed to have an adopted 5 year old brother… who takes monster shits.  We’re talking black-hole like density.  His mother knows this, yet she brings him to my house to shit.  This clogs the only toilet in the house.  This is not a normal clog.  This is a cement-like poo-wall.  His mother simply says, “Oliver takes big shits.  You need one of those big industrial plungers.”

This is indicative not only of an awareness of the problem, but that this is a regular occurrence.  How is it that you bring your known monster dump-taking, toilet clogging child over to SOMEONE ELSE’S HOUSE to fuck up their toilet without bringing your industrial strength plumbing tools with you?   Seriously?  You know there is a problem.  You take him to my house to unleash his problem.  With these factors in play, I have to  consider this intentional toilet destruction.

So, here I am, off to Home Depot to purchase an industrial strength plunger and a toilet auger for good measure because someone lacks consideration.

I return home, hand over the goods to the GF (who proceeds to deal with the vandalism while the vandals sit passively in the living room).  Come to find out later, that the sheer mass and density of this shit ball makes every attempt to defy even the toilet auger.  The toilet auger is made of fucking metal, and this poo is defying it.

Perhaps this is indelicate, but I find your little shits big shit even less tolerable than your little shit.

I thought I’d be the last person to EVER say this, but feed that kid some fucking vegetables.  He obviously needs the roughage.